Coming home... or what does Life consist in?

Coming home, the first thing I do is embracing my daughter. I caress her hair, kiss her on both cheeks,... and I think to myself: “How many children are there on the planet Earth who don’t have parents? Who have nobody to caress, embrace and soothe them? Have I done everything today to decrease what I don’t like in this world and to expand what I like?” And I understand I haven’t done everything possible.

Then I go to wash my hands and think: “How many people in the world are deprived of access to pure drinking water, not to mention hot water in a bathroom? How many of them die every day, having no opportunity to wash their body or drink water…?”

We sit down at the table and start eating supper. We talk, while thoughts go on streaming in the background: “How many people on the planet Earth are starving now? How many of them are cold or badly sick?”

My daughter asks me how my day was. I tell her about my work, my colleagues, at that thoughts give me no rest: “How many people right now lack elementary things such as water and food?”

Later on we go to my’ daughter’s bed, read or watch children’s fairy tales. Thoughts in my head are as follows: “How many people in cities have no place to sleep? And how many children are among them?”

If my body’s not too tired, I wait for a moment when my daughter falls asleep. And when this happens, a treacherous thought comes: “Perhaps, you need to sleep, too? Look, you are tired, you had a tough working day, and tomorrow you will have even more things to do! If you start working on something now, it will take one or two hours, while it’s already 11 p.m.! Thus you won’t have enough sleep. If you miss it once, it’s OK.” At such moment the voice in my head almost convinces me, but then I stand up without any hesitation, go to the kitchen, open my laptop, and start working on the Unity Social Network project. At the same time many of my friends begin to watch movies, play games, surf through their social media accounts, etc. I cannot let myself do that. I cannot let myself “relax” in the conventional sense just because behind everything I do there is a sincere desire to help those whom I thought about and felt empathy for. At that I “rest” during my work. Probably, it’s difficult to understand how it’s possible to rest and work at the same time. Well, I keep being amazed at this myself. By the way, in your opinion, when am I writing this article? Yes-yes, right now – at 23:32, and I’m doing this for everyone whom this article may support. And I’m not feeling tired at this moment. I only have a feeling what I’m doing is right.

In order to make clear how my communication with other project participants takes place (for I work on such projects during my leisure time which is really late), I shall give an example. Usually I look through my e-mail very rarely, but once I thought: “I need to check the mail.” This thought surprised me, since I check it once a week or even more seldom, but I did open the mail that time. In my mail box there was a message from my friend Ahmed who offered me to take part in the AllatRa book billboard advertisement campaign together with several other movement participants from our city, in particular to share billboard advertisement costs. Since I could then afford that, I agreed and continued working on my project.

I participate in other projects only from time to time, when I have inspiration. One of such activities is writing articles. For instance, today I have got an idea that I need to share what I’m actually doing, what thoughts attend me, and what I feel.

Besides, I teach programming, since it is my major job and I know this field better than anything else. Most often I face a lack of self-confidence in people. The majority ask themselves one and the same question: “Am I really able to master this, given the way I am?” It’s very difficult to convince another person that everything’s possible and not as terrible as he or she thinks. The only thing which helps is daily self-improvement work and regular reminders to students that they really can cope with the task.

And here comes the time when I complete a part of my work. Usually it’s midnight, sometimes 1 a.m. Even such a limited period of time is enough to promote the project quickly. Then I go to bed, while a treacherous thought in consciousness attempts to diminish the importance of what I’ve been doing just before: “Well, now you won’t have enough sleep, you have only 5 hours left for this. What work for tomorrow can you plan?”

At that, I recall the very last thought of the day: “Is there anyone who’s dying right now? Do many of those people know about the Spiritual World existence? Have they prepared themselves for It? Perhaps, they are totally unfamiliar to you, but maybe you know them…” Then I recall my grandmother. She has an inoperable tumour, and doctors say she has no chance to survive. Since I love her and love those people whom I even don’t know… I will continue doing what I’m engaged in, for this is what Life consists in.

P.S.: One would think, where can you take energy in the morning, if you regularly don’t get enough sleep? Such thought disturbed me for as long as I paid attention to it. Then I simply decided there were more important things than sleep, and I didn’t care about what happens next. And here’s what I’ve noticed: I do have energy, and I feel myself filled with Joy and Love, and the feeling is as if someone embraces you and guards you against all difficulties whatsoever. This means what I’m doing is truly significant, whereas if I need help I will always get it, and if I can cope with a task myself I must do it myself:).

Prepared by Alexandra (Ukraine)